"How do you do to recover from a breakup with someone you loved so much and never imagine your life without? How do you do you to keep yourself all together despite the many feelings that overcome you? How do you do to keep trusting God during this hard time?....."
Hello Precious, I hope you are doing great by God's Grace. Today, I would like to talk to you about breakup. Yes, it is very sensitive I know but I do receive this type of questions from young ladies and to tell you the truth, I do not have a magic remedy that will make you feel better or make the pain you feel at the moment suddenly go away........
But the good news is God still loves you and is with you although you may think otherwise....
The Word says in Revelation 21.5 "Behold, I make all things new". First of all, I want you to know that this breakup is not the end of you. Do not think for a second that you will never be happy again nor you do not deserve the best in your life, those are lies from the ennemy who seek to destroy you from within and steal the joy of God in your heart.
Thank God for this breakup, thank Him for all the valuable lessons you learnt from this relationship, thank Him for allowing this to happen. Nothing happen in our lives for nothing if you are a child of God, you must realize it. Job said to his wife "Should we only receive good from God and not trouble?" like Job I am telling you to see behind this painful situation the hand of God, He will take of you and you will recover from it.
Years ago, I was in love with a handsome man, Godfearing man, very caring oh my, he had all the requirements I listed for a good man, he was above my imagination. To tell you the truth, we began to court but I did not have the yes of God, I followed my emotions, I told myself we are both Christians so it was definitely the will of God. We dated for about a year and half and suddenly I was asked to break the relationship. I remember that day like yesterday, I was listening to a preaching from my pastor and I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit telling me "Do you know that I do not approve your relationship with this man? " The first thing I did when I heard this voice was to try to silence it. In fact, I did not want to be alone, I was happy with having a beloved, a man by my side.
The Holy Spirit told me "You are not ready to marry. This man is a prince and you still behave as a baby. I cannot give you this man. If you love me, you should let him go". Tears began to roll under my eyes. I began to cry loudly, I told God not to put that man away from me, I needed him next by my side, I did not want to be alone and God told me you are not alone, you have your family, your friends, you have ME. I said no I need that man. To cut the long story short, I realized a day after, that I was so immature to stay in that relationship, I did not love truly that man I loved the fact of having a beloved like most of my friends. I wanted to show to people that just like them, I was going forward and I had a beloved.
What I am trying to tell you ? Believe in God's Word. On the spot, I didn't realize how much I was immature, I thought I needed this man while what I needed was to know God and strengthen my relationship with Him. Believe me when I tell you though His Word that this situation is for your good and from that, God will create new things for you!
Second of all, I want you to stay true to God. Do not mask your emotions before God. If you need to cry your heart out, do it, cry, shout, express your pain in your closet. There is no need to be strong before God. There is no need to keep your feelings inside you. God did not create you a robot, you are an emotional being, God knows that. David cried before God, He was true to him and His God, do the same. Tell God how you feel. You are the right to tell Him that you thought you would marry with this man, that you even had the names of your children written in your notepads, or that you thought all those dreams you had were true, you have the right to tell Him what is in your heart.
Finally, although it may be difficult for now, know the best is yet to come. The future will never be behind you. It is before you. Do not be like the wife of Lot who turned back to see what happen to her beloved city. Learn from the past but keep your eyes in front of you. Take time to heal from this breakup. There is no need to rush, you are not into a competition with another woman. Do not jump from this relationship to another one to prove to your ex that you are over him. You have nothing to prove! Take this time to become a better you. You certainly know why this relationship did not work out, work on yourself, deepen your relationship with God, invest yourself in new activities to keep yourself busy, and most importantly keep believing in God and in you! You are chosen! You are loved! You are beautiful! You are fearfully made!
There may be pain in the night but joy always comes in the morning! This situation may be a night for you but very soon morning will come and this should become an old memory, because you have been through that, you will be able to advise people about it. Your scars are your victories. A man told me "What have you gone through? What have you survived?"
It is all well, precious! God will never break you! Everything work together all for your good!
You are loved,
With love,
Larissa
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